One wonders if that fictitious Irish gentleman would have included a discussion of baptism in his book. If not he should have. History proves that baptism discussions are sure ways of starting fights. But the question is - why?
I have personally come to believe that while genuine Christians may never find total agreement regarding the mode, meaning, and proper administration of baptism we can at least live at peace with one another. In fact I've often felt that the reason baptism can be such a flashpoint of controversy for many of us Christians is because of our own ignorance. In a word, we do not understand the baptismal practices of others nor do we want to understand them. And yet... shouldn't Christian charity and godly humility lead us to at least try and understand those Christian brothers and sisters with whom we disagree? I recall the Christian apologist John Lennox once telling us "You have to love your opponents enough to read what they're reading. If you don't love them enough to do this you'll never understand what they are thinking." If this is true for our "opponents" how much more should we exhibit this kind of love to our fellow siblings in God's household?
By way of confession, there was a time when I was unwilling to try and understand other baptismal practices... I think I had come to believe that to do so might in some way force me to compromise my own beliefs and/or the distinctives of the churches I belonged to... But this was a silly thing to fear. Over the course of my life the Lord has providentially forced me to examine and re-examine the various baptismal practices of the churches and denominations that I've been part of. Far from undermining my convictions the process has actually helped crystalize my position on baptism. But more than this, it has helped me better understand and (by God's enabling grace) to better love all of Christ's people... even the ones with whom I disagree.
Wouldn't it be a wonderful thing if the Body of Christ, despite its differences and without compromising its respective convictions on secondary matters, would love each other enough to try and understand each other? Rest assured if we accomplish this there will never be an Irishman anywhere writing about us in 101 Ways to Start a Fight.
Let me encourage you to begin exploring differing baptismal practices. A good place to begin might be with R. Scott Clark's provocatively entitled article Is Infant Baptism a Roman Catholic Leftover?