Getting Nude & Going to Church?

​In this edition of 100% True History From the Annals of the Church, we expose The Adamites, uncovering this obscure 2nd century sect.  Unless you are a history buff chances are you’ve never heard of the Adamites, let alone learned of their odd doctrines filled with visible cracks on the surface...  So sit back, relax, and consider the Adamite debriefing that follows.  
 
While time has stripped away the body of the Adamite’s theological beliefs we are still able to uncover at least one of their foundational doctrines and to lay bare the bizarre practices that accompanied it.  In a word – and this is the naked truth – the Adamites were nudists and only the sky-clad could attend their services.  It is also worth pointing out that nearly every early leader of the sect was a clergyman who had been defrocked. 
 
Before unpacking the details, however, we must pause to redress an error.  The aforementioned historical facts about the 2nd century Adamites, brief though they are, nevertheless help correct the flawed modern assumption that it was Southern Baptists who, out of their zeal for “proper” church attire, first taught the extrabiblical doctrine of Sola Suit (Suits Alone.)  History proves that it was, in fact, the Adamites who first taught this doctrine, beating the SBC to the punch by some 1800 years.  The one minor difference between today’s Sola Suitism and ancient Sola Suitism is that the former refers to business suits while the latter refers to birthday suits.   
 
Let us now move on to dismantle the Adamite’s exhibitionism, asking ourselves, why did they do it?  While some historians, using hairy reasoning, claim that they did it out of a spirit of naked aggression, this is simply unfounded.  In reality, the Adamites attended church in the nude believing that they, having eradicated all sin in their lives, were simply returning to the state of innocence enjoyed by Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden.  For this same reason Adamite congregations preferred to call their assemblies “paradises” rather than “churches.”  

​Their insistence on nudity meant that they would receive a chilly reception from other Christians but the nudity was not the only reason for this.  Many found the Adamite’s so-called spiritual practices to be alarmingly fleshly.  Among other things, the Adamites promoted female ordination (the sect was dominated by women), encouraged sexual immorality among members, forbade marriage, lived communally, frowned upon private possessions, and even refused to practice charity – convincing outsiders that the Adamites were merely self-absorbed skin flints.  These practices, and others like them, certainly got under the skin of orthodox believers.
 
While today some regard the Adamites as little more than the butt of a joke, and while they never really gained a large body of followers it should  be pointed out that the Adamite movement was almost impossible to put under wraps.  In various garb the sect spread over time from North Africa to Spain, then on to Bohemia, and eventually even into London, England before finally dying out in 1660, nearly a millennia and a half after they began.
 
Today, perhaps due to the Adamite’s negative influence, clothing is mandatory in Roman Catholic, Orthodox, and Protestant churches alike.  Thanks be to God!