in this installment of 100% true history from the annals of the Church.... Are you a married woman? Is your husband a totally unbearable jerk? Would you like to get rid of him without violating any international laws? If so then St. Wilgefortis, the bearded lady armed with power from on high can help! That’s right! Thanks to the help St. Wilgefortis, all of this can be yours!  meet Wilgefortis the bearded lady and saint Of all of the weird stuff ever produced by the Roman Church (and there’s lots!) little can be considered weirder than its 15th century creation of St. Wilgefortis, the patron saint of ‘women wishing to be liberated from abusive men.’ St. Wilgefortis’ very popular cult began at some point in the 15th century after pictures and sacred artwork from Eastern Europe were brought to the West by traveling traders and merchants. These Eastern pictures "clearly" showed a bearded woman – dress and all - being crucified as a Christian martyr. Unsure about the actual story behind these depictions a handful of people (most likely claiming direct revelation from God) claimed the bearded woman's name was "Wilgefortis" (an obvious choice), and began crafting a legend that would result in her promotion to sainthood.  According to her legend Wilgefortis had taken a vow of virginity in her youth but her unscrupulous father saw that she was beautiful and, in an attempt to get his hands on some cold hard cash was planning to force her into a marriage with a pagan king, her vow notwithstanding. Between a rock and a hard place Wilgefortis prayed that she would be made repulsive. In His mercy the Lord responded to her prayer by causing a beard to miraculously sprout on her face. The pagan king, who apparently had always dreamed of having a beardless wife broke off the engagement in short order leaving W’s angry father to crucify her in a fit of blasphemous vengeance.... or so the story goes.  And so for more than 100 years the cult of St. Wilgefortis grew in popularity until someone came along and burst W's bubble by pointing out that the whole thing was one regrettable mistake. There never was any vow of virginity, no unscrupulous father, no pagan king to marry and no crucifixion - why? Because, as the bubble-burster pointed out, Wilgefortis was a myth... she never existed. To all of this disheartening flood of information, many of the faithful objected, “But what about the pictures? Everybody’s seen them! If that bearded lady is not Wilgefortis, who is she?" And that’s when the coldest and hardest part of the truth came home to roost… That crucified figure in the pictures was not a bearded woman at all. In fact nowhere at any time has a bearded woman ever been depicted in sacred art. This being the case, the mystery was quickly solved. Apparently in the 15th century some artists from the East depicted Christ on the cross wearing a long robe instead of the loin cloth that Western artists put Him in. Mistaking the robes for a dress some Western Christians also mistook Christ for a bearded woman… Thus was born the myth of St. Wilgefortis as here unfolded in this installment of "100% True History from the Annals of the Church."  One final note... Don’t worry, the cult of this legendary androgynous character was officially suppressed by the Roman Church in 1969 (finally!).... but anyway as Protestant’s we’ve never looked to bearded ladies for spiritual help in the first place... |
Rev. R Crabtree"...a son, a husband, a father of 6, a friend, a Presbyterian Archives
November 2022
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