The World's Dumbest Accusations Against Early Christians

Today on 'North of the Clerical Collar' we return to the 
Fan Favorite Feature:
 "100% True History from the Annals of the Church"

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In this post we will be looking at
The World's Dumbest Accusations Against Early Christians

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Yes!  
​It's easy to make sensationalistic claims about others - particularly about those we don't like or don't understand.  Just ask Alabama Senatorial Candidate, Roy Moore!  But it is a lot harder to actually prove such claims.  

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Making wild and hidebound accusations might put a person in the limelight for a time but, as Shakespeare put it "at the length truth will out."  And this means that if you make crazy-false claims you'll eventually be shown for the yardbird that you are.

One of the unbelieving world's greatest hobbies down through the years has been to hurl ridiculously absurd charges at the Lord Jesus and His followers.  Sometimes these charges are even believed by the more gullible members of Christ's Body, who respond with handwringing displays of sackcloth and ashes, never pausing for a moment to realize that the accusations aren't actually true.  One thinks for example of the ongoing (and I might add, disgraceful) bustle of activity taking place within conservative Presbyterianism over the following claim of Cultural Marxist's provocateurs –  "Presbyterianism has historically been far too white and must, therefore, repent.”  
 
How silly!    

To begin with – what does “too white” even mean from a biblical perspective?  I think I know what it means to those who hold ‘congregational diversity by coercion’ to be of sacramental importance... But I cannot see how traditional cultural expressions (be they European or otherwise) are inherently sinful...  Nor do I believe them to be hindrances to the gospel.  Surely culture has been the vehicle through which God has used the gospel to reach entire people groups – red, yellow, black, and white. Therefore I see no reason why a distinctly European tradition like Presbyterianism should repent of its historical success among those who are primarily of European ancestry...  but I digress.     
 
The point is, wild accusations of one form or another have always been made against the church and they will continue until the Lord returns for His bride.

So...  how should the church respond to the accusations of her opponents?

Well, capitulating won't work.  Nor will groveling before our slanderers in an attempt to appease them.  Nor will admitting guilt where there isn’t any. 
 
But here's what might help...  First we should consult 1 Peter 3:15:

"in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect,"  
(1 Peter 3:15, ESV)

And then...  we should laugh at silly accusations...  Yes.  That's right.  We should laugh.  It would do us some good.  And anyway, often times charges made against the church are just so dumb that we have no other option.  

Also, when we laugh we should remember that we are in good company. The church from the very beginning has been forced to laugh off countless silly accusations made against it.  

Here are a number of examples that the early church had to put up with:

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Accusation #1:  "Cannibalism!"
Apparently a pagan misunderstanding about Holy Communion gave rise to this accusation.  Eventually the ghastly notion of "serving god for dinner" morphed into the absurd claim that early Christians also ate their own children during church services.

Accusation #2:  "Incest!"
This claim arose from the fact that early Christians called each other brother and sister and professed to love one another with an intimate, undying affection.  It was even alleged that church meetings were in reality wild sex parties.  

Accusation #3:  "Idiotic"
The fact that many early Christian churches were comprised of working class men, along with women, children and even slaves, gave rise to the accusation that Christianity was only for the gullible and/or uneducated.

Accusation #4:  "Self-righteous!"
Yes.  It's a topsy turvy world in which you can be accused of cannibalism and orgies on the one hand and then shamed for being a goody two shoes on the other.  Nevertheless, this was the charge directed at early Christians for their upright, law abiding lifestyles.

Accusation #5:  "Atheism!"
Since the early Christians refused to worship the traditional gods of Rome, they must have been atheists, right?  Wrong.  Even so, this was the charge brought against the early Christians for their faithfulness to the one true God.

Accusation #6:  "Unpatriotic!"
This accusation probably arose because of the false belief that all early Christians were pacifists who would not fight for Rome.  After a number of Roman soldiers were converted this charge more or less died out. 

Accusation #7:  "The cause of the world's problems!"
This broad - but silly - accusation implied that anything that went wrong within the Roman empire was somehow the fault of the early church.  As one early Christian summarized it "If the Tiber overflows its walls, if the Nile does not rise to the fields, if the sky does not move or the earth does, if there is famine, if there is plague, this cry is at once 'The Christians to the Lion!'"